This is my walk of shame; putting my fingers to this MacBook Pro, to say “hey big head”, after a whole 10 months of abandoning this assignment God gave me. (Forgive me, Lord!). The reality of COVID-19 hit me just as hard as it did everyone else. But I ghosted y’all. Left you on read like that last unanswered “You up?” text. I may not receive your grace…fair. But I am thankful God is not like man. He is the God of a second chance. Third, fourth, and fifth if you aren’t ashamed to admit it! Psalms 136 says “His mercy endureth forever,”, but I’d rather not run His patience so thin being merciful that He moves on to a more obedient disciple. So, guess who’s bizzack?! ME…I’m back…not like that old ex you’re comfortably dysfunctional with, but back like your direct deposit every 2 weeks in the midst of a global financial crisis (insert praise break).
So, what’s been up with y’all? Me, let’s see. In 2020, God allowed me to lose 2 grandparents and my first pregnancy to miscarriage. In spite of those loses, I can STILL say God has been good. I got to marry my best friend and became a WHOLE bonus Mama, home-school teacher, and “Suzie Home-maker” all within a global pandemic. Oh, did I mention, I’m debt-free? Needless to say, my transition from Living Single to Married with Children happened in the blink of an eye! Life isn’t just about how many gigs I can fit into one day anymore. As the Queen of my castle, I also have stock in the balance of my home-life for myself AND my family.
God allowed all that we’ve all endured this year to give us a hope and a future for the next.
Naturally, the New Year often brings hope in the form of resolutions. I’ve made quite a few intentional resolutions for my physical health and wellness to live a better of quality life. However, my overall resolution is to find balance and gratitude in all things. In sadness and grief, to new life and fulfilled dreams, I resolve to live in harmony with all the goodness that God is.
It sounds easier said than done. Trust me, I’ve started and stopped the wagon a few times or 10 at this point in life. But what I have learned through every trial, is humility and the capacity to be used makes room for God to show up in unprecedented ways. A resolution only works because of the personal relationship and commitment to its purpose...just like marriage. God has revealed that in order to achieve my resolution, I will need to commit to a few thangs in 2021:
I will be obedient to the voice of God. Being in tune with God gives me the confidence to make a move when He commands it. One way I have found deeper connection with God is through fasting. It allows me to meditate on God’s promises and decipher His voice over the voice of your enemies.
"And yet, O Lord, you are our Father. We are clay, and you are the potter. We all are formed by your hand."
Join me in fasting!
I will know my enemies. No, not your IG stalker. But, the enemy of anxiety, addiction, fear, and insecurity. Be able to identify them when they contradict God’s promises.
"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7
I will have faith in the promises God has for my life. Things may still not go the way WE envisioned in 2021, but trust and know that God is still faithful.
"Soon – and it will not be very long – the forests of Lebanon will become a fertile field, and the fertile field will yield bountiful crops."
I will surrender my to-do list to God. I will begin my mornings with prayer and seek God’s plan for the day as it relates to His purpose for my life.
"And pray for me, too. Ask God to give me the right words so I can boldly explain God’s mysterious plan that the Good News is for Jews and Gentiles."
I will build my tribe. Know who God is calling you into community with. They are likely people who share the same pain you have experienced.
"And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near."
What resolutions are YOU making in 2021, Beauty?